2001

The talking dog has transported me to the year 2001 where everyone has gone mad. They’re going after this guy who had an affair with his intern who was murdered. He won’t talk to anybody because he wants to get re-elected or something. He thinks he’s a suspect, only he’s not; he’s just weird.

The lights keep going out in California because some guy eating Lays keep draining the power. They finally execute the jerk that bombed that building in Oklahoma. Then they want to try his partner again because they want to kill him too. He gets the same life without parole though. They should send Tony Soprano after him.

And we’re being invaded by sharks. Yeah, there was one sighted off the coast of Utah and he’s bigger than Jaws. Oh, my god! We’re all going to die. Keep the sharks the way from me, please, I need to know what to do in case of a shark attack. Help, help…HALP!!!!!.... oh great, what’s that on TV now?...

Oh, s***!

( Drawing by Bloominglove at Deviantart.com)

Event of the year:  Sharks are seen off the coast of Nebraska eating Gary Condit

Fad: Anthrax

Babe of the Year: Shrek

Scandal of the Year: College Student super glues his hand to his penis

Movie or TV show to barf to:  The 700 Club

What we could have done without: I’ll give you one guess

Pet of the year: Bin Laden

Other Tidbits: Jerry Falwell blames 9/11 on sugar fairies and Lutherans, The XFL replaces the NFL as hockey’s top league, Phil Donahue beats Bill O’Reilly up, Johnny Walker Red captured in Afghanistan, The Shoe Bomber eats his socks, Donnie Darko becomes a priest, Everyone forced to travel barefoot, Timothy McVeigh eaten by wolves, the Leaning Tower of Pisa falls asleep, Enron is a bunch of greedy bastards, Baby Powder discovered by Tom Brokaw’s secretary, Milosevic arrested for being a jerk, Napster closed down, reopens as a McDonalds, President Bartlett orders an airstrike on Qumar and solves the Kennedy Assassination. Hillary Clinton says cancellation of Baywatch is a right wing conspiracy, Tony Soprano crashes Monica and Chandler’s wedding, Al Gore grows a beard, loses Cuban election.

This is another pretty neat year for me. I’m getting older now so my taste are getting a little more refined.  But I should have discovered some pretty interesting stuff too by now, so let’s see what we have…

1)  White Stripes- White Blood Cells

2)  Sparklehorse- It’s a Wonderful Life

3)  Radiohead- Amnesiac

4)  Manic Street Preachers- Know Your Enemy

5)  Death Cab For Cutie- The Photo Album

6)  Weezer- Weezer (the Green Album)

7)  Gorky’s Zygotic Mynci- How I Long To Feel That Summer In My Heart

8)  Mercury Rev- All Is Dream

9)  Travis- The Invisible Band

10)  Bob Dylan- Love and Theft

11)  The Circulatory System- The Circulatory System

12)  Built To Spill- Ancient Melodies of the Universe

13)  Spoon- Girls Can Tell

14)  The Shins- Oh Inverted World

15)  Microphones- The Glow, Pt. 2

16) Dirtbombs- Ultraglide in Black

17)  Kristin Hersh- Sunny Border Blue

18)  Guided By Voices- Isolation Drills

19)  Of Montreal- Coquelicot Asleep in the Poppies

20)  Sam Phillips- Fan Dance

21)  Pernice Brothers- The World Won’t End

22)  REM- Reveal

23)  Air- 10 000 Legend

24)  My Morning Jacket- At Dawn

25)   I Am Kloot- Natural History

The quality of albums still remains high as there are some pretty decent ones that don’t make my list or honorable mentions. The White Stripes really break through this year and White Blood Cells tops my list. They’re closely followed by Sparklehorse and Radiohead with their best since OK Computer (I don’t think Kid A is as good, so sue me). The Manic Street Preachers and Death Cab For Cutie round out my list. Gems in my Top Ten include a surprising Weezer album, Gorky’s Zygotic Mynci, and a nice effort by Bob Dylan who still has it. Other gems in my top twenty-five include the Circulatory System, the Shins, my surprise, the Dirtbombs, Sam Phillips, Air, and I Am Kloot, which was also something of a surprise for me.

Biggest Surprise- The Microphones- The Glow, Pt. 2

I wasn’t very impressed with the Microphones earlier efforts so I was pleasantly surprised to hear this gem. It’s certainly pretty low-fi and the singer is even off key at times, but that’s really the charm of this album. The melodies are good and it’s a damn good piece of psychedelia in my opinion. This could have worked in the late sixties.

Biggest Disappointment- Brian Jonestown Massacre- Bravery, Repitition, and Noise.

Don’t get me wrong; this is not a terrible album, but except for a track or two, this album kind of falls flat for me. I’m a big fan of a lot of their stuff so I guess I was hoping for something a little better. As it is, the album is listenable, but really nothing especially noteworthy, kind of unusual for BJM.

Honorable Mention- Gorillaz- Gorillaz, Rufus Wainwright- Poses, Live- V, Lucinda Williams' Essence, Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds' No More Shall We Part

Stinker of the Year-  Nickelback- Silver Side Up

And here we go with the album that established Nickleback as the most boring band on the planet. I mean people love these guys. Why? I don’t know. Maybe there are more masochists than we thought. Yeah, that’s it. Perverted guys like to be tied up in the bedroom and forced to listen constantly to How You Remind Me. I heard it was also used in lieu of water boarding because it was more effective. I better turn them off before I turn into a babbling idiot--- oops, too late :D.

So here we are. Welcome to the new normal. At least the music is still good so we’ll see you next time when we cover 2002.